En morsom historie....om kvinner versus menn

[Goliath]

Den er litt lang, men vel verdt å lese:-)

Remember the book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus"? Well, here's a

prime example offered by an English professor at an American University.

"Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story.

The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person

sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will then write the

first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the first

paragraph

and then add another paragraph to the story. The first person will then

add a third paragraph, and so on back and forth. Remember to re-read

what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent.

There is to be absolutely NO talking and anything you wish to say must

be written on the paper. The story is over when both agree a conclusion

has been reached."

The following was actually turned in by two English students:

Rebecca - last name deleted, and Gary - last name deleted.

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STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't

decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be

her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of

Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she

felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His

possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much

her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.

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Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack

squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think

about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie

with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago.

"A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic

communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so

far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam

flashed out of nowhere and blasted hole through his ship's cargo bay.

The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the

cockpit.

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He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he

felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman

who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped

its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4.

"Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel,"

Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously

excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of

her youth - when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with

no newspapers to read, no television to distract her from her sense

of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must

one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully.

---------------------------------------------------------

Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.

Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership

launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy

peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty

through congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the

hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the human race.

Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships

were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the

entire planet.With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their

diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the atmosphere

unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine

headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the

inconceivably massive explosion which vaporized poor, stupid,

Laurie and 85 million other Americans. The President slammed his fist

on the conference table. "We can't allow this! I'm going to veto that

treaty! Let's blow 'em out of the sky!"

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This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature.

My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic, semi-literate

adolescent.

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Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose

attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh

shall I have camomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of

FUCKING TEA???

Oh no, I'm such air headed bimbo who reads too many Mills & Boon

novels."

----------------------------------------------------------

Asshole.

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Bitch.

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Wanker.

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Slut.

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Get fucked.

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Eat shit.

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FUCK YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!

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Go drink some tea - whore..

*******************

A+ - I really liked this one.

Mvh